26 Comments

I turned 27 a few days ago and it was the first birthday in a long time that I didn’t feel a sense of impending doom at the thought of getting older. I’ve accepted that the woman I am now is a combination of all of the girls I’ve been (and I have a good feeling that my younger selves would be proud of who I’ve turned out to be, regardless of whether I’ve checked off society’s imposed milestones or not).

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That’s so beautiful to hear 🥹🩷 I hope you had a special day!!

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Hope yours was too!!

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That's so special & inspiring

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I’m turning 37 on October 1 and even though I tell myself I don’t need to do or plan anything this year since I’m getting married this month as well etc etc I know deep down I better let my people love me and celebrate or I will feel a sense of emptiness and loss. It’s hard to ask people to show up for you. But I’ve learned if you don’t have any expectations, you will not be disappointed. If I’m with at least one person I love I’ll have a wonderful birthday. Being a woman is hard but - “you’re doing great sweetie!” 🙃

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Yes, communicating your wants with the people you love can feel like too much sometime but it’s so important. And I agree, being with one person who is special to you can make the day feel amazing :) I hope you have a beautiful wedding!! <3

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I turn 23 in a month, too, and as someone with plenty of experience in crying on her birthday and very mixed emotions about it (existential angst/excitement/sadness/numbness), this was a much needed piece. I relate so deeply to feelings about your birthday shifting from pure excitement to something more nebulous and uneasy as we get older. Thank you for writing this, and a belated happy birthday!

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Thank you Rithana, I’m glad to hear you enjoyed the read :) I hope you have a great birthday!!

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This is so smart I feel so heard

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I’m so glad <3 thank you for reading

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So validating, all hot girls cry on their birthdays it’s clearly a right of passage! I think it gets easier with age, I still cry on my birthdays but a lot less than when I was in my teenage angst years! Happy birthday 🥳

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Closing line of ‘it’s just a birthday’ is so true & powerful. Such a great close to the article.

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Thank you so much Martha 🤗 I’m finding that it is getting easier with age, this year was a particularly strange one though. I’m glad that my thoughts connected with you <3

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god the American girl magazine moment just unlocked a memory 😂 happy belated birthday!

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Yess never forget AG Mag!! Thank you Mary :)

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I have major birthday issues. The first year that I was on Facebook (20 years ago?) and I got 400 birthday messages, I immediately changed my birthdate to February 30 so I would never have to endure that again. 🤦🏻🤣 I do cherish small celebrations with my partner. They feel safer and more authentic.

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Ahahah February 30, that’s brilliant 😭 Glad to hear I’m not alone! Smaller celebrations are definitely more comfy for me too.

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This piece is so beautifully written. It needs more recognition. ❤️ This is the first time I've read you, and I really wish you get all that you are deserving of in this field.

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Aw thank you so much Rajani :) appreciate you reading!

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Kept coming back to this as my birthday came and went. Everything we do, even when we don’t feel we deserve it is because we hope that the little niggling we feel that tells us otherwise is true. Felt nice to force another round of celebration because I deserve to be celebrated even though life looks so unlike I planned. Thanks for your words !

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Thank you Arieon :) Happy belated birthday!

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Happy belated birthday Madison! This piece was absolutely palpable. I could feel the emotion in it. As someone who has also subscribed to the "Cool Girl" mentality on my birthday, I totally feel all of this. But this year, I decided to try to be more open to letting myself have expectations and make plans. Even though I had moments where I felt I didn't deserve such a nice celebration, I'm hoping the fact that I actually let myself do something means that it'll only get easier.

Thank you so much for sharing this. You articulated so many thoughts and feelings I've had in general and about the sadness on birthdays. Really loved this piece 🫶🏻🩷

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Thanks so much Summer <3 so glad to hear it resonated w you, I think choosing to have a more open mind about making plans is a healthy way to approach it - you deserve to be celebrated! Hope you have a great bday, whenever it is!!

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Thank you! <3

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i loved reading this and related to so much!! from the american girl doll magazine to wondering what my younger self would think of me now. will be turning 26 soon and luckily i’m not dreading it as much as i was with turning 25 🤣

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So glad you enjoyed it :)! I’m confident that with time the birthday angst will soften a bit 🤞 And glad to know the American Girl Magazine experience is more universal than I thought ahahaha

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