Have you seen “Sometimes I Think About Dying”? I think it beautifully captures something about the PNW’s socially anxious misanthropic loneliness and self-isolation. I have also found denser cities (first NYC and now, San Francisco) a beautiful form of exposure therapy to counteract my suburban Portland upbringing.
"Listen a little closer and speak up a little more - the worst that will happen is someone will listen."
this last sentence is wonderful. <3
a few months ago, during a catch up with my girlfriends over tacos and margaritas, one of them broke down and cried over the end of a long-term friendship. I feel like I've become quite German (having lived here for nearly 5 years) and balked at the idea of my American friend being so loud and emotional in public. 5 minutes later, the waitress came over with tequila shots for us, as she'd witnessed the pain being exchanged in the group. So you're right, sometimes people around us are listening, and most of the time, people around us are good and kind.
aaa thank u for writing this!! i realize that the serendipitous moments of connections that i cherish the most almost always emerge from someone’s decision to break out of these strict social conventions, even tho most times im too afraid to be that person. this essay is def inspiring me to be a bit braver n to try to cultivate the serendipity that i crave :,)
I just love this!! Last night I was in a bar and I was just overjoyed with the opportunity to people watch because it really reminded me that I live in this little bubble of friends who are vaguely similar to me and there are so many different people out there!! We dress different and act different and THINK differently, and it is so important to be reminded of that and have the chance to be immersed in it!!
Reminds me of Amanda Mull’s essay for the Atlantic titled “the pandemic has erased entire categories of friendship,” where the author talks exactly about what you’re experiencing now in NYC: passive relationships with people in your neighbourhood, little nods and little comments here and there. It’s really wonderful that we can flex these social muscles again and interact with people beyond our tightest circle of friends
This is wonderful! You put into words the love so many of us share for big cities, but beyond that, for the fleeting moments of connection that daily encounters can bring us. Thank you for writing this piece
This was a lovely read! Something I think about often is how even amid the sometimes grossness of the subway, looking around at all of the people is one of the most beautiful things possible. And those weak ties walking around your neighborhood are pleasant if not sometimes stressful to me; who do I know well enough to wave at? Why does that mom I once handed a bandaid to when her child was screaming never even smile back at me? Haha. We've also had extremely confusing neighbors in multiple apartments, and at this point I try to assume that seemingly unfriendly people are just even shyer than me.
This was great to read! I've never been to New York and I am such a fan of the accent and the overall main-character-energy. MCE? Is that a thing? and I agree, there is a fine line between putting up a city act and then being so happy if someone does put their phone down and shares a real-life comment with you.
Have you seen “Sometimes I Think About Dying”? I think it beautifully captures something about the PNW’s socially anxious misanthropic loneliness and self-isolation. I have also found denser cities (first NYC and now, San Francisco) a beautiful form of exposure therapy to counteract my suburban Portland upbringing.
"Listen a little closer and speak up a little more - the worst that will happen is someone will listen."
this last sentence is wonderful. <3
a few months ago, during a catch up with my girlfriends over tacos and margaritas, one of them broke down and cried over the end of a long-term friendship. I feel like I've become quite German (having lived here for nearly 5 years) and balked at the idea of my American friend being so loud and emotional in public. 5 minutes later, the waitress came over with tequila shots for us, as she'd witnessed the pain being exchanged in the group. So you're right, sometimes people around us are listening, and most of the time, people around us are good and kind.
aaa thank u for writing this!! i realize that the serendipitous moments of connections that i cherish the most almost always emerge from someone’s decision to break out of these strict social conventions, even tho most times im too afraid to be that person. this essay is def inspiring me to be a bit braver n to try to cultivate the serendipity that i crave :,)
Such a great article, so many feelings of wanting space and then not !
I just love this!! Last night I was in a bar and I was just overjoyed with the opportunity to people watch because it really reminded me that I live in this little bubble of friends who are vaguely similar to me and there are so many different people out there!! We dress different and act different and THINK differently, and it is so important to be reminded of that and have the chance to be immersed in it!!
“kindness, curiosity, and an open spirit” 🙌🏻🙌🏻 #amen
Reminds me of Amanda Mull’s essay for the Atlantic titled “the pandemic has erased entire categories of friendship,” where the author talks exactly about what you’re experiencing now in NYC: passive relationships with people in your neighbourhood, little nods and little comments here and there. It’s really wonderful that we can flex these social muscles again and interact with people beyond our tightest circle of friends
YOU AMAZE ME THIS IS SO GOOD
This is wonderful! You put into words the love so many of us share for big cities, but beyond that, for the fleeting moments of connection that daily encounters can bring us. Thank you for writing this piece
Marvellous article.
This was super sweet!!
Makes me miss living in NYC a lot and grateful for all the special encounters I did have.
But honestly I don’t miss the subway lol, too many germs and too many subway breakdowns.
love the article!! this is such a great read
This was a lovely read! Something I think about often is how even amid the sometimes grossness of the subway, looking around at all of the people is one of the most beautiful things possible. And those weak ties walking around your neighborhood are pleasant if not sometimes stressful to me; who do I know well enough to wave at? Why does that mom I once handed a bandaid to when her child was screaming never even smile back at me? Haha. We've also had extremely confusing neighbors in multiple apartments, and at this point I try to assume that seemingly unfriendly people are just even shyer than me.
This was great to read! I've never been to New York and I am such a fan of the accent and the overall main-character-energy. MCE? Is that a thing? and I agree, there is a fine line between putting up a city act and then being so happy if someone does put their phone down and shares a real-life comment with you.