19 Comments
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salvatore's avatar

“A lot of people want what they can’t have; I want what’s right in front of me.” - what a statement!! love this for you.

love the writing, thoughts and reflection of this piece. you do such a great job at framing those positive/negative feelings on rigidity/plasticity and how environment really does shape one’s lifestyle and way of thinking. may our choices be not the right one, but the one’s right for our development - and may you find a sense of home, regardless of where you reside :))

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Lauren's avatar

the older i get, the less i feel the need to define myself at all.

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Kevin Maher's avatar

I find it impossible. And not that important, to be honest. Too busy being.

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Elle's avatar

i love this so so much and it was so beautifully written—also, i sorely needed to read this

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Caroline Beuley's avatar

Congrats on one year in California!! Sometimes it overwhelms me to think of how many lives I could have lived other than this one -- with a different career or in a different city etc. etc. but it's also kind of beautiful, makes the path I ended up feel even more special :)

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Deb's avatar

This so good and so true ! There are only decisions!

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Barbs Honeycutt's avatar

I love hearing about these 'sliding doors' moments.

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Donatella's avatar

Feeling the need to justify your actions is something I fear will never go away; now more than ever I feel as though I explain myself or provide the rhyme or reason for doing something. Someone told me that it never goes away, you just learn how to shut it up. Cheers to turning 25, been here for a few months and trust me, its not the scary

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Carl Danielsen's avatar

Long live the open mind!!!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

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Emaan Baig's avatar

Loved this

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Madison Huizinga's avatar

Thank you :))

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B Jones's avatar

Great essay! I agree that letting go of the desire for narrative coherence is part of growing older. There is beauty in flowing with wherever you happen to be in life. But the Bay Area is also just a wonderful place where it is possible to create any path that you want to journey along.

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Mita Kompella's avatar

I loved this one 🫶❤️‍🔥

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Ana Gaby's avatar

I Iove this so much !!!

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McKenna Pringle's avatar

Being an SF lady looks fab on you 🙂‍↕️

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Chiara's avatar

I loved this! Was beautifully written

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Evie's avatar

this is so lovely and articulate— made me feel better about my own love for both nyc and home (pdx) 🤍

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Gail's avatar

You’re very independent and that in itself is a very admirable trait! I was not so brave at your age, trying out different lifestyle settings to see where your comfort zone is. Enjoy the journey! I finally found my place in my 60’s.

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